I want to be 4 Again!!!

I'm feeling so out of touch these days the light only remains for a short while. It's like I'm walking on air, nothing feels solid; the work, the loves, the conversations,BLEH! Feels like I'm waiting, searching and hoping to come into that moment when my skin fits, when my life is mine and I can do as I please with it. I want to be like Lesedi, my 4yr old daughter, light, flowing, slow to anger, quick to forget. She notices the most strangest things like,
"mommy why are your eyes red? were you sleeping?"
me: "Yes, I slept on the way home"
her: "Look at my eyes, are they red? No, they are white"
(conversation in vernac ofcourse, makes it more funny).
She is very thoughtful, like waking up my dad to give him a banana while is he sleeping...lol.
I definitely think I want to be 4 again; cartoons, sweets, sleep, playing with water, hugs and kisses...such bliss!
She is quiet the diva but I love her nonetheless.
My main drive when I became a parent, was to live my life to the fullest so that my daughter knows she too can. Not to be a sacrificial lamb. It's a perfecting love...
I just resigned from my job, my feet are itchy, I WANNA GO TO BEAUTIFUL *singing..
I call on the Universe to bless me with a cool job while I wait for my UK Studies next year and to push me out of the door so I can see more. I've been feeling so powerless, overall wackness, unfinished thoughts, deeds,projects...I just want to live and be less mindful of external and internal noise. Can I reclaim my own Loveliness, cause that I am!

SmaUniverse,

Its Yours!

Education as myth?

It's easy to say, "Live each moment,Fully", we only do have one chance to live our lives. There are days when I question the choices I have made. Am I following my passions to the fullest? Am I doing justice to my Dreams? Because right now they are all I have, informing everything I do. It's been hard to move forward without an ounce of doubt, everywhere I look there is someone living fully, achieving their dreams. It's been hard to learn to listen to the rhythm of my own step. If there's ever one thing a person can do, it is to sorround yourself with extraordinary, like-minded people, and for this I'm grateful.

This post has been difficult for me to write. I wanted to explore what I call, "Education as a myth", for various reasons. One thing I've come to learn is that you do it for yourself. I'm probably not the only young person I know questioning whether or not I have made the right career choice. What tends to bother me the most is that I know so many of my friends who are highly educated and yet are unemployed or find themselves in unsatisfactory jobs. The myth is that once you have that piece of paper, the riches will start pouring at your feet. It's a reality not all of us come to experience. We wake up every morning praying that the god of all 'kick-ass' jobs will hear us and grant us our wish.
What do you do when you live in a country that is stuck in a 'pay-check to pay-check' mentality? All we know is the world of revolving credit that constantly keeps us where we dont want to be.

I've spoken to many friends about this and I've been on the edge of resignation many times myself. A friend of mine said of her job, "I feel like staying here is damaging me". It's hard, what do you do when you have been given the gift of responsibilities? I'd love nothing more than to wake up and find my dreams realised.
What's the solution then? How do we keep motivating 'Education' as a way out?
Crappy bosses, crappy jobs, careers gone wrong; will forever be a reality. Therefore you must decisively weave your own meaning, your own dream and hopefully one day it is tears of joy that you and I will both be crying, because dreams are worth every ounce of determination.
The inspiration is around us,  the people in our lives who can attest to this.
For now, I hold my chin up and continue following the trail of my dreams.
You are not that job, with or without you remain, and hopefully money does not hold us prisoners as we do our best to "Fully Live in Every Moment".

"All Paid Jobs,absorb and degrade the mind"..Aristotle.